4 Tips for Raising a Confident Child

I was the best parent ever—full of wisdom and advice—until I had children. That’s when all my wisdom flew out the window. Years later I have learned a thing or two about parenting. Mainly I have learned I don’t have all the answers and different measures work with different children. We all want our children to grow into happy, healthy adults, but confidence can be hard to come by. It’s a rough world out there, but these are simple tips to help boost a child’s self -esteem.

crystalsprings

1. Encourage their dreams. My children have wanted to be everything from a garbage collector (my daughter’s dream career at three) to a sheep farmer. There were careers I secretly hoped they wouldn’t choose, but I responded, “Awesome! You want to be a garbage collector (or whatever!) You can be whatever you want when you grow up.”

Six Flags, Atlanta, Ga

2. Accept their personalities. My son has severe social anxiety. He hates to talk to new people and is extremely quiet. (This did pay off in winning the best student award each month in kindergarten to second grade.) I couldn’t understand why he wasn’t outgoing, like me, but his doctor urged me to understand he would never be like me. His personality was the polar opposite. Recently, when I was chatting with his doctor, we discussed how much progress he has made. He’s finally beginning to open up even if it did take seventeen years!

3. Encourage them to try new things. The ten year old could live off of chicken nuggets and sweets. Because of this I instigated the “taste it” rule. Whenever we are out to eat at a buffet , we all try one new dish. It only has to be one bite and there are no expectations. If he dislikes the food, he doesn’t have to try it again. I’ve been surprised by how much he has discovered he likes.

Justice League comics included inside!

4. Encourage positive role models. As you can see from the picture, the ten year old loves superheroes from the Justice League. He is always modeling his super hero powers for us.

Do you have tips for  raising  a confident child?  Do you have a favorite Justice League hero?

69 Comments

  1. Great tips and my kids just love Big G cereals!

  2. I love these tips, oh so very true! I especially love the personalities one. We all have our quirks 😛

  3. Great tips you have shared. I am a mom of 4 and still can use them.

  4. These are all great tips. I will use these because I want to raise confident children.

  5. This is all great advice! Parenting is a super difficult job and we all learn as we go. Both of my girls were complete opposites but we have always made a point to let them know that we value their uniqueness. It’s amazing to see them develop into the people they want to become instead of molding them into what we think they should be.

  6. I don’t know of a Justice League hero, but my son loves wearing a superhero cape. I love when he runs around the house with it on.

  7. this is great advice and no worries about the garbage collector job my son told me last year he wants to be a fry maker at Mcdonald’s. Now he wants to be the first rock star to hold a concert on the moon as a certified astronaut. I think I’m in trouble. I also like your one bite rule it’s good to try new things heck I tried Snails this past summer YUMMy (so not).

  8. Thanks for sharing great tips! I’m a first time mom, and I gladly read all tips I can. I think it’s important our kids and us too, to raise confident children.

  9. This post is so important. It is one of the best things we can do to raise confident children. You gave good tips that will help many parents.

  10. Great advice! I can’t what to hear what my little guy wants to be “when he grows up”. Kids are amazing!

  11. Great tips! When I thought of what my life would be as a mom I saw things like making gingerbread houses, playing dress up, and mommy and me classes – all of which my kids could care less about. At some point you have to let them be their own people! 🙂 It may not be what I expected but it’s perfect. ♥

  12. I love these tips. I’m not a mother yet, but I think you have the right kind of wisdom to share with new moms. I’ll be there soon enough!

  13. I am so with you. I was an excellent parent–the best, even, until I actually had children of my own. I remember wondering how Britney Spears’ child possibly fell out of the high chair, until faced with my own toddler trying to climb out of the high chair….

    Great advice! thanks for sharing!

  14. I currently have 2 children and they are exact opposites of each other. My daughter clams up when anyone speaks to her. If she is upset about something, she’ll get tears in her eyes but not say anything. It is so hard to get her to express how she is feeling. My son on the other hand is in your face, talking to strangers and isn’t shy about how he feels. Its so funny how kids are so different.

  15. Hahaha, my second oldest (just turned 21) has the same thing going on with being the world’s best parent (because he’s not one). 😉

    I have four children, and each of them does have entirely different personalities. It’s very important to embrace that, and we do. 🙂

  16. I’m working on getting my kids to try more new things.

  17. These are great tips! My daughter wants to be a horse trainer, I think she will be amazing at it if she follows through. My son wants to be a policeman or a fireman… of course, this may change down the road since he is only four 🙂

  18. I like the taste it rule. When my husband and I got together, he didn’t like anything that wasn’t American and southern, as far as food goes. Now he loves Mexican food perhaps best. We even went to eat at a Brazilian restaurant a few weeks ago. You really can’t say you don’t like something until you have tried it. You just don’t know what you are missing.

  19. These are definitely some wonderful tips. A child with a good self-esteem can do anything they put their mind to!

  20. Confidence is key. If you don’t help build them up and encourage them someone else will be there to break them down. I always encourage kids to be leaders, not followers.

  21. Wow! What a handsome superhero. Reminds me of when my son was little

  22. My son doesn’t really enjoy being around people either. He gets really anxious as well. He can fake it pretty well, but inside he’s pretty miserable if he has to do the social thing for too long. I think that’s why he likes working outdoors so much. It’s a total release and so restorative to him.

  23. It is hard to always support them. I try to find a way even when I dont agree.

  24. I really like number 4 as I feel like I am often having to make sure the people in my childrens lives are good role models or at least not terrible ones (when it comes to extended family). Our children are always watching, and that can be scary if the people around them lack good character.

  25. I love this post. I hate when it seems like we all have a certain mold to fill. Everyone should be allowed to be themselves and embrace their quirks!! 🙂

  26. These are great tips, I love the last one about encouraging positive role models! My daughter is young, she’s turning 3 in April, but I still encourage the things you mentioned.

  27. I think everyone is the best parent until they have kids!! Great post! You are doing a great job!

  28. i think that MOMS should have capes. and maybe dads. i’d totally wear it.

  29. Great tips. I had a mom who did the opposite of all of those and it took me forever to grow into my own skin. I plan to raise my children to be proud of who they are…

  30. Amy Lynn Desrosiers

    My kids saw our Cheerios Box with DC Comics on it and insisted we open it up right away!

  31. I think remembering how it felt when you were frustrated as a child and making sure to not project your dreams onto them is so important. Love your list.

  32. Great tips.. you are such a cool SUPER Mom…and boy do my kids have different personalities and YES.. I accept every one of them the way they are.. !!! Thanks for sharing.. soo important

  33. This is such a good post. I love the positive message and look forward to the goodies in the Big G cereal boxes.

  34. Great tips. Accepting their different personalities is one of the hardest things to do as a parent but by far one of the most important.

  35. I don’t know, garbage collectors make good money – your daughter may want to reconsider. LOL! Great post – I love how accepting you are of your children’s interests and personalities. That’s awesome!

  36. lately my 3.5 year old is stuck on saying things like, i can’t do it, and i just keep encouraging her to try and try again. take her time and she will get it.

  37. I love this, confidence is key and it teaches them to love them self and see their worth.

  38. My tip? Let them dance to the beat of their own drum. If my DD wants to wear her hair or wear a certain outfit I may not like or fancy, but she does, I let her. I give her the confidence to be herself. 😀

  39. We remind our kids that they were created unique and for greatness, with verses from the Bible as well 🙂

  40. Thank you for this post! I have always felt that it is very important to teach your children to be confident.

  41. Positive talk is so important! Don’t tear them down with your words. Be mindful of what comes out of your mouth.

  42. These are really good tips and it is so hard to see our children struggling with things that come so easy to the rest of us. I guess my biggest tip is support. Always be there an know they can count on you even if they might not be at their best. We all have our moments.

  43. Yes I do, I use it with my youngest all the time. I don’t let him say I can’t. If he says it I tell him he can.

  44. Your tips are amazing. I also think exposure to everything helps. After the kids come from school, we play and learn from art and music to math and science. I feel the more they are exposed to in a fun way, the better decision they can make as an adult. And yes, they get to choose the fun we have at night as well.

  45. These are all terrific tips. All of my children are as different as night and day. It’s important to cherish them individually.

  46. Sounds like you’re a great momma! I have to say, my parents did all of these things, and I turned out okay 🙂

  47. I love this post. It provides some great tips.

  48. Great tips. Parenting is certainly a hard road to navigate. I love that you were supportive of your daughter’s garbage collector dreams. Isn’t amazing what little minds think would be fun to do?

  49. great post! I have 2 little superhero’s too! Our job as moms is to encourage them!

  50. This is a good post. You’re right, you have to parent based on the child and not some set of rules you were given before giving birth. I just *love* when someone who has no children informs me what I’m doing wrong with my parenting. Your tips are great and I think they’re spot on for how to really raise a child.

  51. Super tips….superHERO tips!! hee.

    really, i encourage the kids to think about what makes them happy and to work on doing that when they are older.

  52. Great post. I bet we can all relate to that first line!

  53. My kids have Superman and Spiderman capes and they love to wear them around the house. It’s so cute and fun. I love all your tips. We try to encourage our kids when we “catch” them doing good things like being kind to someone, so hopefully that reinforces good behavior.

  54. What great tips! The accepting their personalities really rings for me. My son is nothing like me, I swear if I say up, he says down. It really is a challenge… this is a good reminder not to take it to heart and keep supporting me no matter how unique and different from me. Thanks for the great read!

  55. Encouraging them to be self confident can be a real challenge. It’s hard as an adult too at times.

  56. I’m big on encouraging my children’s dreams and aspirations. I think that’s one of the most important things a parent can do.

  57. What great tips!! I especially love the tip about eating at a buffet and having to try something new!

  58. Isn’t it funny how we know exactly how to be perfect parents until our kids actually arrive? I was the same way! Love your tips!

  59. Great post, love these tips! Sometimes it’s so hard to let our own opinions go, I am so stubborn and say, ‘because I say so’ way too much. I must work on this more.

  60. I want my daughter to be confident and not to have others make her feel bad about herself at any time… Her dreams are so important~!

  61. These are great tips for anyone who is raising a child. I don’t have children, however I recognize good family values in these points.

  62. These are all amazing tips! Being new to motherhood, I am always open to learning and taking a few tips from experienced mothers. I too try to be positive, super supportive and encouraging at all times.

  63. Fantastic Tips/ So important to encourage dreams.

  64. Wonderful tips here. I try to be positive, encouraging and supportive – but it’s not always easy. I love how you handled the announcement from your future garbage collector. :)My son loves the Hulk. Is he a Justice League hero? 🙂

  65. Those are all great tips. I always do my best to help guide my boys in a positive way and I remind them often of what they are capable of.

  66. These are excellent tips! It’s so important to to be there for children and always encourage them.

  67. Those are great tips! Seriously how is it that we know how to be the perfect parents until the kids show up? lol.
    We also have the taste it rule. You have to take at least one bite. if you don’t like it, then fine. But you still have to taste it. Every single time I put it on the table. Even if we had salad last night and you tasted it and didn’t like it; you never know when those taste buds will change; you have to taste it tonight too.
    I love that rule.

  68. My 6 year old is exactly like me and exactly like her father all rolled up into one person then she’s exactly like my three older step kids. oh the stand off’s her and I could have some days. Today was one of them she’s calm now but it breaks her heart and makes her super angry when I say the word No. lol then she asserts her independence I don’t want to do what you say lol I’m going to do what you tell me not to do lol

  69. Helene Cohen Bludman

    It’s not always easy to show support when you don’t agree with their choices, but it’s important to let them find their way, bumps and bruises and all.