As a child I was sure I didn’t want to be like my mother when I grew up. I was the late in life miracle child, making my mom not fit into the “hip, cool mom” status or the “this is my last kid, I’ve relaxed my strict parenting rules” category of all my friends’ moms. Worse, she didn’t have an amazing career. Instead, she had chosen to be a stay at home mom. Since she was stricter than any of my friend’s moms and not up to date on the latest trends, I didn’t see (at the time) her compassion for the less fortunate, her willingness to be a cheerful helper in any situation, her uncomplaining nature, no matter what the circumstances and her unfailing kindness to everyone.
Diagnosed with stage four Ovarian and Uterine cancer, she was rushed to the hospital for emergency surgery to remove a massive tumor. After coming out of surgery and into recovery, her first words to me were, “Pamela, I am sorry I have ruined your birthday. You didn’t have to spend the day with me at the hospital.” “Don’t worry about it,” I joked, “You can take me out for an expensive meal when you are well to make up for it.” Sadly, I knew, after a brief discussion with the doctor, there would be no recovery. My mom knew this too. “I know I am going to die, Pamela,” she stated, “and it is okay. While I wish I would live long enough for my grandchildren to remember me, I am at peace with it.”
During her illness people we had not heard from in years—people who had moved and lived in other states—popped in to visit my mom and tell me, “You didn’t know this, but your mom helped us when we were destitute. She never told anyone.” “Your mom was the only person nice to me in high school.” “Your mom was the only person outside of family who ever visited my grandparent (or parent) in the nursing home.” “I never heard your mother say a bad word about anyone.” The list went on and on.
Even after twelve years I still catch myself laughing about something and thinking, “I would love to share this with my mom.” I strive to meet each day with her attitude, but often fail. She is my ideal of a Woman of Strength; a woman who lived each day to help others but never took credit for herself.
What makes a woman of strength?
Thank you for sharing your mothers story. Your post is so heart felt….thank you.
What a beautiful story about your mom.
I can totally see how you’ve come to rely on that pain relief over the wedding prep. I’m terribly sorry about your mom though. 🙁
Wow, thank you so much for sharing. I am a huge believer in Tylenol as it has helped me many, many times.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I am sorry for your loss.
Aww, what a sad story!! Sorry for your loss!!
I am so sorry for your loss. Thanks for sharing! She is definitely watching over you!
Everything comes back to my mom. She is so strong
Thank you for sharing a piece of your mom. I’m sure she’s been watching over you all <3
I am so sorry you lost your Mom. It’s nice that so many people took the time to share with you the experiences they had with your Mom. I’m glad you can still draw inspiration from her. She sounds like an amazing person.
Wow, what an incredible woman! Your mom sounds like the type of woman we should all aspire to be like!! <3
I cried just reading this. You are a woman of strength. I lost my mom too and its a heart pain you can’t even describe. I was so touched by your story and just keep finding reasons to like you. Your a great heart and I thank you for sharing with us. 🙂 Hugs
I wish I could be more like your mom. She sounds like a genuinely lovely woman with lots of love to share and give. She would be so proud of you for the person you are too!
What a beautiful story. That must have been so hard. I would be devastated.
She seemed like such a strong woman, I am so sorry she left so young. cancer is a terrible thing.
I’m sorry to hear about your loss. So great to know she was loved by all!
What an inspiring woman. Do you think her illness/death brought you the realization of her character or the fact that you got older?
I realized it by the time I was a young adult. I always thought she was a good person, I just didn’t realize how much strength of character she had!
I am so sorry you lost your mom early to cancer. She sounds like a wonderful mother who made a difference in other people’s lives.
That is so sweet that people dropped by to tell you stories about your mom. I bet that was really comforting and nice to hear!